758+ Chinese Jokes brings you the funniest punchlines, clever puns, and viral one-liners inspired by Chinese culture, language, and everyday life in 2025.
From dim sum wordplay to chopstick chuckles, this list is your ticket to non-stop giggles.
If you’re here to spice up your group chat, learn some cross-cultural humor, or just brighten your day, these jokes are stir-fried to perfection for maximum laughs.
Funny Chinese Joke
😂 My Chinese friend opened a bakery. His motto? Bake it till you make it.
😂 I tried to make tea like the Chinese do… but I steeped too far.
😂 What’s a Chinese ghost’s favorite food? Wonton souls!
😂 I watched a kung fu movie and ended up fighting my cravings for noodles.
😂 My fortune cookie said, “Avoid jokes today.” I laughed anyway.
😂 Why did the Chinese lantern go to school? To get a little brighter!
😂 You know you’re in a Chinese restaurant when the menu is longer than the Bible.
😂 Why did Confucius open a comedy club? He believed in ancient stand-up wisdom.
😂 What do you call a Chinese cow that plays music? A moo-sician.
😂 That Chinese chef had a wok and roll attitude.
😂 Did you hear about the Chinese robot?
😂 I spilled soy sauce on my joke book—now all my jokes have extra umami!
😂 What do Chinese comedians use for punchlines? Chopsticks—they’re always sharp.
Chinese Joke Names
🤣 Wok This Way
🤣 Dim Sumthing Funny
🤣 General Tso’s Laughs
🤣 Lo Mein Lenny
🤣 Bao Bao the Pun Master
🤣 Fortune Fred
🤣 Sweet and Sour Sam
🤣 Kung Pao Carl
🤣 Spring Roll Rick
🤣 Soy Sauce Sally
🤣 Rice Ricky
🤣 Egg Foo Yawn
🤣 Noodle Nick
🤣 Teriyaki Tim
🤣 Panda Punch Pete
Uncle Junior Chinese Joke
😄 Uncle Junior said, “They got duck sauce? You better duck when it’s real sauce—blood.”
😄 “I knew a guy in Chinatown. Said he made dumplings. Turned out he made bodies disappear.”
😄 “You ever see a Chinese guy eat pizza? That’s globalization. That’s power.”
😄 Junior claimed the Chinese invented noodles and mob codes.
😄 “I asked for hot tea, not FBI surveillance.”
😄 “Egg drop soup? Sounds like my marriage.”
😄 “This isn’t MSG. This is MSGUNS.”
😄 “Chinese checkers? Nah. I play Sicilian roulette.”
😄 “The only chopstick I need is a stick to beat sense into Paulie.”
😄 “You want fortune? Invest in dim sum. Or silence.”
😄 “I told them: no spicy. They gave me General Tso’s Revenge.”
😄 “Chinese takeout? I took out more guys than their whole triad.”
😄 “You think the Chinese can’t whack you? Try crossing them. Just try.”
😄 “They gave me tea. I gave them respect.
Tell Me a Chinese Joke
🤣 What did the Chinese calendar say to the zodiac? You’re so last year.
🤣 What’s a Chinese comedian’s favorite meal? Laugh mein.
🤣 Why did the panda become a joke writer?
🤣 My Chinese friend told me a pun about rice…
🤣 Why don’t Chinese restaurants play music? Too many woks on stage.
🤣 How do Chinese chefs tell secrets? Low mein-tenance.
🤣 Why did the dragon cross the road? To get to the tea shop.
🤣 Chinese noodles are like jokes—best when stretched out.
🤣 That tofu joke? It had no substance.
🤣 Why did the student bring chopsticks to class? He wanted to ace his food history test.
🤣 How do you know your joke is bad? Even the fortune cookie sighs.
🤣 The Chinese food was so spicy, I told the waiter, You’re on fire!
🤣 Want to hear a joke about fried rice? Never mind, it’s too stirring.
🤣 They say laughter is the best medicine, but I prefer miso soup.
Chinese Jokes Dark Humour
- In China, ghosts don’t scare people… it’s the Wi-Fi cutting out during online shopping.
- They say the Great Wall can be seen from space. You know what can’t? My social life.
- Chinese horror movies don’t need monsters—just show the menu without fried rice.
- In China, reincarnation is real. That’s why I’ve been reborn as a broke student every semester.
- What’s scarier than a dragon? Your mom reading your internet history.
- They don’t tell ghost stories in China… they just show the electricity bill.
- A Chinese vampire doesn’t suck blood… it drains your bank account on Singles’ Day.
- The scariest phrase in Chinese dark humor: “Your WeChat payment failed.”
Best Chinese Jokes About Foreigners
- A foreigner asked for authentic Chinese food… so we gave him Panda Express.
- Foreigners love chopsticks until they realize it’s the only utensil available.
- Tourist: “Why is it called hot pot?” Local: “Because you can’t afford the air conditioning.”
- Foreigners say Chinese is hard… but still mispronounce “ni hao” as “meow.”
- A foreigner asked, “How long is the Great Wall?” The guide replied, “Longer than your flight home.”
- Foreigners love fortune cookies… but we don’t eat them. That’s your joke, not ours.
- A foreigner tried to bargain at a Chinese market… now he owns the whole stall.
- Foreigners fear Chinese traffic… we just call it “daily exercise.”
Chinese Jokes for Adults
- In China, love is blind… but your parents will still ask for your partner’s salary.
- Dating in China is like hotpot—spicy, messy, and someone always ends up crying.
- Chinese Wi-Fi is like relationships… strong in the beginning, weak when you need it most.
- They say size doesn’t matter, but try telling that to someone with a small hotpot table.
- Marriage in China: first comes love, then comes WeChat Pay.
- The only thing faster than Chinese trains? Gossip spreading in your family group chat.
- Chinese alcohol is like relationships—you regret it in the morning but do it again at night.
- In China, true romance is when your partner lets you eat the last dumpling.
Sopranos Chinese Joke
😅 Tony said, “That’s not duck sauce. That’s blood money.”
😅 Paulie ordered dim sum and asked, “Where’s the sauce for the snitch?”
😅 Silvio said, “Chinese got honor. We got… problems.”
😅 They tried to bribe a triad boss with cannoli. Didn’t end well.
😅 Chris thought chow mein was code for a hit.
😅 Tony once said, “You trust a guy who eats with two sticks?”
😅 A Soprano in Chinatown? Sounds like a sequel to a bad movie.
😅 “MSG? Sounds like FBI shorthand to me,” said Paulie.
😅 Carmela’s stir-fry got more complaints than Junior’s alibis.
😅 They did business over hot pot. Only one came back.
😅 “I got dumplings hotter than your ex,” said Silvio.
😅 “You think the Chinese don’t have a mafia? Buddy, they invented it.”
😅 Tony asked for wontons. Got wisdom.
😅 Bobby said, “Forget about it” in Mandarin.
Conclusion
From witty wordplay to Sopranos-style street humor, these Chinese jokes aim to deliver laughs while respecting culture and context.
If you’re looking for family-friendly chuckles or sharp-tongued banter, there’s a joke here for every mood. Just remember: comedy works best when it’s inclusive, clever, and kind.
